food that is better looked at than eaten…

March 20, 2010 at 9:14 pm (March 2010) (, , , )

Hey all!

Long time no blog! I know, I know. It’s been way too long, but such is the life of a college junior. Anyway, I thought the best way to ease back in was to post some pictures up that would make you think twice about eating food. I found these somewhere and thought I’d share them with you. Let me know what you think!

Enjoy! (Literally!)

The Voice of the Vixen

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A question that is still unanswered…

February 20, 2010 at 1:30 pm (February 2010) (, , , , , , , , , )

I’m going to just come right out and say it:

I. LOVE. LADY. GAGA.

Her persona, her voice, her charisma, and her songs are all something that we all aspire to achieve and here she is, an embodiment of all of that – and then some. However, speaking of embodiment: what else does she embody? A penis or a vagina, or both?

Against my better half, I want to claim that Lady Gaga is a hermaphrodite or even a drag queen, essentially implying that she is a man. This claim would essentially make her the most successful hermaphrodite/drag queen there is. (Move over Rue Paul!)

RuPaul

However, the question still remains unanswered. I think the reason why I (along with several other people) are questioning Lady Gaga’s sexual identity is that she portrays herself in such an outlandish and flamboyant manner that it would almost be rude not to describe her as having queenish tendencies. Songs aside, her fashion sense is such that not even the top and most daring designers would attempt to emulate it. I mean have you seen Lady Gaga recently?

http://nymag.com/daily/fashion/2010/02/lady_gaga_slideshow.html#photo=1

We haven’t seen such boldness in sound, dress, and attitude since Madonna:

Classic Madonna

Once the chills go away after listening to Bad Romance, I revert back to thinking: “What is Lady Gaga’s sexual identity?” The other part of me thinks that Lady Gaga is 100% feminine without a drop of testosterone to speak of. What makes me think this is her off-camera persona. She is incredibly feminine in her mannerisms and her voice is also light and airy. Had she been a male at any point in her life, the voice is the first thing that would have revealed her true identity. HOWEVER with enough money and a sharp scalpel anyone can change anything about themselves.

So I need help y’all! What do you think about this issue? Voice your opinion! Leave me a comment! I’d love to get an answer to this question!

Cheers,

The Voice of the Vixen

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Funny but True (part 2)

February 5, 2010 at 1:56 pm (February 2010) (, , )

So here is part 2 of another posting I made a while back. This a continuation of somethings that you never really take the time to think about, but they are soooo true!

Enjoy!!

The Voice of the Vixen

********************

I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your
computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a
text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread
of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Lol has gone from meaning, “laugh out loud” to “I have nothing else to
say”.

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test
is absolutely petrifying.

My brother’s Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing
as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the
name. He explained, “Cuz we beat you, and you hate us.” Classy, bro.

Whenever someone says “I’m not book smart, but I’m street smart”, all I
hear is “I’m not real smart, but I’m imaginary smart”.

How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and
smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when a n entire line of cars teams up to
prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using ‘as in’ examples, I
will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had
to spell my boss’s last name to an attorney and said “Yes that’s G as
in…(10 second lapse)..ummm…Goonies”

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each
other?

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively
swerved to avoid it…thanks Mario Kart.

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know
how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person
died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower
first and THEN turn on the water.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and
you can wear them forever.

I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Whenever I’m Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is
public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB
gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don’t mind if I do!

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would
probably just be completely invisible.

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around
and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous?
Like I know my name, I know where I’m from, this shouldn’t be a problem….

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when
you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for
the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don’t want to
have to restart my collection.

There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to
die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I
want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did
not make any changes to.

“Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this ever.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV.
There’s so much pressure. ‘I love this show, but will they judge me if I
keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching this. It’s only a
matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be
friends after this?’

While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and
USA . No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when
Chinese athletes don’t win, they are executed.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!),
but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to
voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run
away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing
anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

When I meet a new girl, I’m terrified of mentioning something she hasn’t
already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it’s on shuffle, then I
like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for
pedophiles…

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no
matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know
what time it is.

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer
when they call.

I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I find
out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact
that I was not aware of my condition in college.

Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn’t know what do to with
it.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in
a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d
bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away,
in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time…

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day “Dad what would happen
if you ran over a ninja?” How the hell do I respond to that?

It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link
takes me to a video instead of text.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive
behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday
night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they
had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at
the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then
estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a
large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There’s nothing like
being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

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Girl Crushes

December 24, 2009 at 12:35 pm (December 2009) (, , , , )

So, have you noticed how pretty some celebrities are? *Jealous* Below are the girls whom I have ‘girl crushes’ on. Lol. Enjoy! (in no particular order, that is…)

1. Kourtney Kardashian

2. Mila Kunis

3.  Emma Stone

4.  Olivia Wilde

5.  Gina Carano

6.  Cassie

6. Blake Lively

7.  Leighton Meester

8. Tia Mowry

9. Tamera Mowry

10. (Insert Name Here)

Who do you think should be on here?

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A New Year Leads to a New What…?

December 20, 2009 at 12:21 am (December 2009) (, , , , , )

I usually don’t get into the habit of making New Year’s Resolutions because I claim that I am too young to do such things. However, I thought of a new idea, instead of coming up with new things that I want to/should do over the new year of 2010, I will instead tell you what I plan to NOT do over this year. I find it better that if I can acknowledge the things that I sure as hell am not gonna do, then I will feel more accomplished when I do do the things that I wanted to do. It’s more interesting this way.

1. Be nicer. I am already pretty damn nice to people, so if I go on being any nicer I may seriously become a doormat. No thank you.

2. Skydiving. I really cannot tell you what would be MORE terrifying than free-falling from an airplane that is thousands of meters in the air and not knowing if my parachute will inflate correctly. I took physics. I know what free-falling without a working parachute can do to a person. Again, no thank you.

3. Travel to another country Not because I’m apathetic or pompous. It’s because I lack the time and the money to allow me to take such an adventure and I forsee 2010 as being the same way. However, as soon as these two elements are in abundance (moreso the latter than the former), Au revoir les Etats Unis, et bonjour la France!

4. Go to a spa That is like the utmost anti-girly thing to say. That and I don’t like diamonds. The thing is, I can’t stand massages. They tickle me more than they relax me. And yes, I know that there are a lot of other things a spa can offer other than a personal massage (however, if my masseuse is a hot guy with a chiseled body, then I may think twice…), but none of those things are remotely interesting for me.

5. Get a mani and/or pedi I bite my fingernails and toenails. ‘Nuf said. (I’m kidding about one of those!)

6. Diet Yeah. I said it. God knows I’ll try to but won’t really commit to it, because I lack the will power. I’m definitely not fat/chubby, some may even use the word ‘skinny’ when describing me. I just want to tone up a bit and eat healthier. As a college student I tend to get into these bad habits regarding eating and I want to change some of those. That is something that I WILL do. Maybe eat the rainbow everyday? There’s a start!

7. Spend more than I can afford This seems simple and it should make it onto everyone’s New Year’s Resolution list, but I am so frugal that I am pretty sure this will not happen to me. I am probably one of the cheapest people you’ll find. Huzzah!

8. Get a car *Sigh* this is something that I really wish wasn’t on the list, but I’m afraid that I won’t be getting a car anytime soon. I still do not have a license (at age 20) and thus am pretty certain that there will be no car in my future. There’s no way that this is going to change.*sigh x2*

9. Attend a live taping of the Oprah show I swear her system of getting tickets is rigged. I’ve tried and my mother has tried and the fact that I’m putting this on here means it has yet to work. I’ll keep trying but I am pretty damn sure it’s not gonna work. I think it would be cool to sit in on a taping of the Oprah show and possibly get something? Maybe?

10. Appear on a game show My all-time dream would be to appear on the game show Deal or No Deal. That show takes no talent at all except for a single guess, which is PERFECT for me. It’s free money and I could always make use out of it should I win some. But seeing as how getting onto a game show is next to impossible, I’ve resigned myself to actually working for a living. Darn.

So. There you have it. The 10 things I WILL NOT do during the year 2010. I’m sure there’s so much more, but I’ll truncate it to just 10.

Cheers,

The Voice of the Vixen

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The Weird and the Funny

December 12, 2009 at 7:22 pm (December 2009) (, , , )

It’s been a while, but I’ve been busy with test-taking. Ah, the joys of being an undergraduate student…

Back to the point, I like to inspire thought through photographs, so take a look at the following pictures of some of the weirdest and funniest things I could find.

Which one would you crown “The Weirdest of the Weird” and/or the “Funniest of the Funny”??

Cheers!

The Voice of the Vixen

Now this is just too freakin cute!!

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Haha. I love pictures!

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World’s Prettiest Pictures

December 8, 2009 at 11:09 am (December 2009) (, , )

I’m kind of on a trend to put up posts with mostly pictures. Here’s another one. These pictures are some of the prettiest I’ve seen. Enjoy!

Cheers,

The Voice of the Vixen

(Which one is your favorite?)

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Latte Art

December 6, 2009 at 2:34 pm (December 2009) (, , , )

Can’t go two feet without that morning latte? Well here’s a cool spin on those hot drinks! Enjoy!

Cheers,

The Voice of the Vixen

************CAUTION: The contents below may be EXTREMELY hot!********************

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A Thought to Give Thanks

November 29, 2009 at 5:55 am (Introduction!) (, , , , , , )

As my inaugural blog post comes days immediately after Thanksgiving, I thought it would be more than appropriate to introduce myself to the world (via blog) while simultaneously paying homage to the fact that Thanksgiving occurred not too long ago. I am sure almost all the bloggers here are probably individuals who find it their duty to give their opinion on every subject under the sun and then some. As if voicing themselves to other people isn’t enough they turn to a blogging site to express themselves even further.

I'm like this chick...except with more clothes...

I, on the other hand, am very different. You’d be hard-pressed to find me voicing an opinion on anything. I like to keep quiet, as it tends to be much easier to do that, to not say anything at all. I am not one t seek crowds or draw attention to myself as then I am forced to be social and jovial. Not my thing. This is an avenue to hopefully remedy that. I intend to provide anyone who is willing to read my thoughts on things that interest me. This may include reviews of movies, technology, and my various experiences. Or it may include musings of the day. Unscripted. Raw. That’s me.

This Thanksgiving, I was fortunate to (over)indulge in the heaps of mashed potatoes, scoops of corn casserole and turkey stuffing, cups of juice, and of course slices of turkey. In the hazy stupor that immediately followed such a hefty meal, I got to thinking about what I am appreciative of. I am thankful for my friends and family. I am also thankful for music. This is two out of the handful of things I could name, but I don’t want to do too much justice to my name too early on.

I will now sign off and leave you to explore any and all musings as they come.

Feel free to live vicariously through the verbose vixen.

Cheers,

The Verbose Vixen

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